One Year.

A year is a long time, many months, many more days, and many, many more seconds. And during all that time, we’ve experienced so much together, and I remember every tiny detail.

I tell you this every day, but I love being yours, I’m proud to be yours. You continue to amaze me with your ability to selflessly love me. Like when we first started dating, you stayed up until 6 a.m. just to talk to me for a few hours. Or when I shared a goal with you, and you talked to me for an hour about how we could make that goal come to life, you care about my goals and dreams even more than I care about them, and I love that about you. You’re always the one telling me “you can” when I didn’t think I could. 

I would not be where I am today, doing what I’m doing, chasing dreams, without you. You’ve been my rock and my daily encouragement every single day, and there aren’t enough words to thank you for believing in me, and for helping me believe in myself. 

You’re an amazing man, and I’m so lucky and blessed to be able to call you mine, to have you all to myself, and to be the one who gets to love you.

Thank you for loving me the way that you do. I love you Jay. Always have, always will. 

I still remember

the way I felt before we first spoke. I knew I liked you, there was something so different about you, and I wanted to know you. I was nervous. But I did it, and that was the best decision I’ve ever made. 

the first texts you sent me. You asked about me, what kind of things I thought about, what I found interesting, what I wanted for my future. The only times we weren’t talking was when we were fast asleep, but even then, I’m sure we were talking to one another in our dreams. 

riding in your car, with Fleetwood Mac and Ray Charles playing through the speakers. You sang to me and held my hand.

I still remember

our first date. It was a few days before Christmas, and you took me to a Christmas light show, we held hands and laughed a lot, it was freezing outside, but I didn’t even notice.

the long talks into the night with my phone resting on my pillow because my hands were too tired from holding it. At that time, there was still a 6-hour time difference between us, and you stayed up until 6 a.m. every night just so you could talk to me, even if it was only for 3 hours. 

… meeting your parents, family, and friends. I was nervous! Would they like me? Am I enough for their son? Say the right things and smile. But when I met them, I was greeted with hugs and smiles, and all my worries fell off my shoulders, and I felt right at home. I’m happy that they’re my family too.

… how your hand fit so perfectly in mine. No matter where we were or what we were doing, our hands gravitated toward each other. It’s almost as though I had to touch you to make sure you were real, and I wasn’t dreaming. 

I still remember

how you pour me a cup of tea. I can never get it to taste the same as when you make it for me.

when you asked if I wanted to pray together. My heart lit up, because I didn’t know such a perfect man could exist. We’ve prayed every night since then.

the first time you stared at me, told me you loved me, and kissed my skin. I will never forget how special that moment was. I’ve never felt so beautiful and important, but you make me feel that way.

One year. I still remember. I still remember tiny details, and I hope I never forget. Everyday, we get up together and face the unknown. Thank you for giving me yourself and being faithful. Thank you for being the safe place for me to hide when I feel like giving up. Thank you for giving me the greatest year of my life, and helping me to see the beauty in the world.